I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
