I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
