i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
