I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
