Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
