I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
