you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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