I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
