he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I think my nap took me to another dimension
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
