this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
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