drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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