My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
