just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
