goodnight i made you a song goodbye
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
