K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
