That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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