You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize