we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
