Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
