butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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