Well douche your snatch and let's go!
You can't special order awesome
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
