Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize