why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize