when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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