I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
