You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Randomize
