he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
