you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
