last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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