i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
