Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(845): View more from New York

whjeg hajt iyt

(914): View more from New York

say what?

(845): View more from New York

wanna hang out?

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(218): View more from Minnesota

The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?

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(248): View more from Michigan

Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.

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(636): View more from Missouri

PS: I just woke up from my shower

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha

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(971): View more from Oregon

He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.

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(847): View more from Illinois

you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.

(1-847): View more from Illinois

that explains so much

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