nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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