Grow some girl-balls and come out already
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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