One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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