3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
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