somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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