Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
