: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
