Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
