Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
