Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
