Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
