I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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