Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Sober January is a disaster.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
