Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
