this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
