hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
