So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
