Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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