Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
