i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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