Me too!
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
